There is no mongering destination quite like Pattaya. Until you have seen it you have no idea the scope and scale. With so many available ladies it tends to attract the flotsam and jetsam of the mongering world. Not that most mongers are normal but there are some really special rejects out there.

Pretty Sure He’s A Kid Toucher

The image you see to the right is of gentleman that I saw multiple times on Soi 6. He gave me the creeps and I thankfully didn’t have to fuck him. When I commented to others about him I just called him Kid Toucher. Read that anyway you want it.

I don’t pretend to be a fashion conscience monger. I do know that dressing like that in a tropical climate makes you stand out. When you sleaze up and down the soi looking like you drive a white van that you use to abduct kids in you are going to draw attention to yourself. To prove the point, I didn’t take the picture, in fact he was rather famous on Soi 6 and was in a number of posts on social media for being so fucking creepy.

I will also give a first hand account of him discussing his barfine and how it was his first trip to Pattaya and he found it amazing. This was in between breaks of sitting in a fucking corner watching the ladies while sipping a Coke.

Icing on the cake? He’s married!

Here is a pro-tip for you as a monger. If you look like that you scream sexual predator. Change it up!

8 Is Enough

There have always been stories on the Asian monger boards of Indian’s (as from India) rolling into a bar and paying the bar for one girl and and then all in the group having a go at her for one barfine and the price of one fuck. I had never seen it for myself.

That is until this trip.

I was sitting in the Butterfly Bar when this van pulls up and blocks the road on Soi 6. It’s a cluster fuck when traffic is moving. It’s a shit show when some fucktard just stops in the middle of it. That means all traffic comes to a complete halt.

Out jump 2 Indian guys who come into the bar. They order drinks and just kinda hang out. Finally a Thai guy comes in and sits with them (guess the driver) and summons the girls over.

A deep discussion ensues and the cashier who is also the mamasan comes out from behind the bar and joins in. Noddy and I are pretending not to watch what is happening but we both eye each other with our suspicious minds.

The cashier comes over and tells Noddy they want one girl for the 8 of them. Since prostitution is illegal in Thailand Noddy cannot get involved. He’s like its up the girls. I can’t say yes or no.

Cashier nods in understanding and walks back to the group.

Now Noddy and I are watching with interest. Me out of amusement and him out of concern for how this is going to go down.

The group gets more animated. Finally a head gets shaken in no. Bargirl solidarity kicks in and they all shake their heads no. The guys continue to try and convince them and the girls start to filter away in indignation.

Finally Noddy walks over and is like unless you are buying drinks you need to leave as the girls aren’t interested.

The guys pay the bin and off they go. I presume to find the one greedy or naive Thai girl what will say yes.

It’s Their Country

I posted this tale in the forums but it was suggested to share it on the site as well so I will.

I roll down to my laundry on my bike. It’s fast and I turn around and drop it at the desk to pick it up later when I come back in. There was an older farang/Thai couple walking down the soi and they stopped in front of the laundry place to open a beer. The lady saw me waiting and just moved the guy to the side and I pulled up and the lady went to get my laundry.

Boring right?

The guy is pissed drunk at 4 in the afternoon and was incapable of opening the bottle which is why the Thai lady had to stop and help him. He goes into a tirade about this is their country and they should not have to move for a farang. I’m like OK, thanks for sharing that tidbit. The woman with him is embarrassed as hell as I didn’t ask him to move at all.

I was happily idling waiting for the beer to be opened.

He then launches into in my country we acknowledge those that are talking to someone. I went OK and promptly turned my back and got off my bike and into the laundry shop. He then proceeds to start screaming at me and how rude I was. The laundry lady is giving me a look of please don’t engage him and the Thai lady with him was dragging him down the soi. He’s getting looks from pretty much everyone on what the fuck is your problem.

When I walked out of the shop he had stumbled into some large man who gave him a shove back and walked on. The guy kept screaming. Me? I jumped on my motorbike and went and got a shave and a massage.

Weird Right?

All these tales are true. All first hand accounts of the shit that goes on in Pattaya daily. If you are a people watcher it’s one of the greatest shows on Earth. Pattaya seems to attract all the social rejects. It’s a carnival of madness that provides endless entertainment.