This isn’t something about some comic book hero dying. Instead it’s about a personal hero dying. The death of Anthony Bourdain just sucks to me and one I can’t understand. Your hero’s never kill themselves, they go out quietly and with dignity.

Anthony Bourdain

If I had anyone who I personally aspired to be it would be Anthony Bourdain. Dude traveled the world, went to shit places and amazing places. He never hesitated to tell you exactly what he thought. I have lived similar except without the film crew and grueling work schedule to go along with it.

I think his honesty and his ability to reach across cultures, regardless of how setup it was at times taught me a lot. He was always humble even when eating off the floor in a village hut to the finest restaurants with Michelin Stars. That resonated. I kinda took that attitude with me where I went. I never gave a shit about lot of things and was happy to be where I was and give anything a try. Worst that could happen is I didn’t like it.

If you read any of Bourdain’s work or even listen to his voiceover work in his shows, my writing style comes from him to a certain point. So you can see why he was a bit of a hero to me.

Suicide Isn’t A Solution

So Anthony Bourdain killed himself last Friday in France. Apparently he has been depressed and instead of dealing with his issues he just offed himself. Look, I am about to piss off anyone that lost someone via suicide.

It’s fucking weak.

I don’t give a shit what is going on in your life. No one should off themselves. No one. Ever. Yes, I get it’s mental. I understand all this. However, there is nothing so fucking dark and depressing. No hole too deep. No problem too big. Killing yourself is the pussies way out.

To lose your hero to that just fucking sucks. I realize he was just another guy and no, I didn’t put him on a pedestal or worship at the alter of Bourdain but the guy seemed like someone who knew about the dark shit and realized there was always a way out. You don’t survive drug addiction, which included looking through the carpet and possibly smoking paint chips thinking it was crack cocaine only to off yourself in a 5 star hotel.

Nothing in life is that shitty. Nothing!

So It Ends

The commentary on this is his life is over. The joy he brought to millions is gone. There will be nothing new. Only memories that will fade after time. His legacy will be he killed himself. All the good things he did will be secondary to killing himself.

I don’t understand depression. We have all had down moments in our lives, you kinda go through them and then get up and go fuck this, I’m tired of feeling sorry for myself and move on. I found that when I was back in the real world going out and getting royally fucking smashed when I had a major issue made me forget the problem. Mainly because I was suffering a major hangover and after that. I got it all out of me and life went on. Likely not the healthiest solution but one that worked well for me.

So it all ends. A hero dies and life goes on. I will never understand suicide. Life, no matter how shitty it is beats being dead any day of the week.