My Costa Rica trip report on day three is really a “lost day”.  Meaning I more or less got bombed and did nothing.  It started with drama of course.  What is a day without me and some sort of drama.

I woke up at 8 AM with my phone going off.  Remember my dinner date?  Well it was here telling me she will see me at 11 and make sure the taxi was ready.  She had booked reservations to the beach. Huh?  What?  Yes, I was fucked and  it just hit me.  I had two choices here.  Go to the beach with her and see if I could maybe get laid by picking up the tab for an all inclusive resort, taxi, and whatever entertainment she wanted or I could stay in San Jose with the knowledge I could get laid and come out ahead finically speaking.  Well, you can guess what option I picked based on the drama comment at the start of this tale.  To say she was slightly pissed at me would be an understatement.  Not my first time and sure as shit won’t be my last time of her being pissed so life goes on.

With that out of the way I talked to Steve from and told him the tale of what just happened and he just laughed and said right move.  I would have come back pissed off from 2 days on a beach which I hate and a case of blue balls by anything other than my own choosing.  So I ordered breakfast and in walked Ingrid who owns the spa in the Sportsmens Lodge.  She reminded me that I had a massage scheduled with her at 11.  So good thing I didn’t go.  My shoulder was killing me and I really wanted a nice massage and Ingrid is well trained.  So with my morning booked up I shot the shit with Pops and Miamiheller.  Pops had some stunning Nica or Tica but she had Filippina in her so she was exotic as hell.  Pops who was in an auto accident didn’t slow down at all even with a walker and disapperared into the room with this stunning little number.  To say the least we watched her turn and burn at least 4 guys that day.  Miamiheller wanted a massage too but he was working his chica data book.  These two guys love Costa Rica and its their happy spot.  They don’t pretend it’s the best place on the planet and they roll their own way so respect to them.

When the witching hour of 11 hit it was off to the Bambu Spa.  I was a bit shy here because I know Ingrid on a friend level because of LA Diablo who is her boyfriend and business partner.  So getting almost naked in front of someone that I know was a bit weird.  She was really cool and told me what to do and telling me to shutup a couple of times because I was a bit nervous and talking and making jokes. At one point she slapped my ass to finally shut me up.  I’m sure if others go and see her there will be no ass slapping and being told to shutup.  That’s reserved for me.  Ingrid does a really good, really professional massage and there is no funny business about it.  You want as close to a Thai massage as you can get outside of Thailand or a Thai lady you go and see Ingrid.  She will treat you right and she will make sure your body is relaxed and stretched in the most therapeutic way.  Tell her Spanky sent you and she will know it’s me.  If any of you degenerates attempt a happy ending from her I hope you get your ass kicked because she could do it.  She’s a real professional trying to make a living.  Not a puta!

So massage was done and Ingrid and I shot the shit a bit outside the spa and then I wandered off in need of a beer.  She looked at me like I was crazy when I said I needed a beer because after a massage you should have water to flush the lactic acid out of your system.  I pointed out that beer is mostly water so it counted.  When I wandered back to the bar LA Diablo was sitting there with Pops and Miamiheller so drinks were ordered.  This is where things went down hill and while others filtered in and out LA Diablo and I were trading beer for beer until I passed him at some point.  Food was ordered and Ingrid joins us.  I know at one point Ingrid wanted some shirt and LA Diablo was out of cash so I just gave Ingrid the money for the shirt as a tip and she disappeared to place the order.  I wasn’t feeling any pain at that point.

We kept drinking and having a good time and we were debating on going to the Pirates Club because it was near LA Diablo’s apartment but Ingrid wasn’t fond of the idea so we just kept sitting there drinking and having a good time.  One drink led to another and the next thing I know we are staggering up to the Amistad.  We were having a good time and the owner was there and he and I don’t see eye-to-eye on a certain subject so I kept baiting him until he popped off and got pissed.  We were watching the girls going up and down with customers and at one point I had one come over for some reason but I was too obliterated to do anything.  Eventually Ingrid and LA Diablo went to bed but I went to the Del Rey and staggered around and said I’m too drunk to stand let alone fuck so into a cab and back to the room.  Passed out happily.

So ended another day in Costa Rica without fucking.  Go me!