I think it’s been mentioned that I am going to Pattaya? If not well, I am in Pattaya! I am going to give a brief recap of the first 3 days or so.

Day 1

I arrived in Pattaya at Midnight. While I appreciate a good taxi driver that values safety doing 110 kilometers isn’t the fastest I have been on the expressway. Still, I guess its better to be safe than dead.

Once I checked in I had every intention of going to bed. Well, plans have a way of going pear shaped here. Instead I promptly showered, changed and headed out. The bellman who carried my bag to the room was like you said you weren’t going out. I said I was going to 7-11.

Went and saw Little Aoy at her place of employment. I immediately got hit up for 2000 Baht loan (in disclosure she’s asleep behind me as I type this). After promise of repayment on the 10th I relented and gave her the money.

After that I went to Walking St to Sweethearts Agogo and hung out with Nestor for a bit who is one of the owners. Somehow shots were being bought and things went a little bleary eyed. I finally ejected out of there at some point. Motorbike taxi to the room.

Hell, there’s a nice enough bar open right there. So popped in for a nightcap. The owner was equally as bleary eyed as me and we had a couple and I was done. Staggered to the 7-11 for something to eat and some water.

Bellman was like you said you go 7-11 many hours ago. I pointed out I did. I just failed to mention which 7-11.

Day 2

I was supposed to pick up stuff that I had stored at a friends house. My sense of direction being what it is failed me spectacularly. After an hour of driving around I said fuck it and ejected. I had another appointment to get to.

Stopped off and say my tattoo guy to get some more ink done. Once that was sorted out I dropped off laundry as I was rapidly running out of clothes. All very exciting I know!

It was then off to the Tahitian Queen! At first it was dead quiet in there. I saw Kan who would jerk me off in the bar the last trip but I really wanted to see Ja. She wasn’t around and I was about to pay my bin and leave.

The next thing I knew I had Ja sticking her tongue down my throat. Why yes! Another round please and one for the lady.

We started to make out more and I was getting into it but something was slightly off with Ja. I figured it out, she was drunk as a skunk. She proceeded to tell me she killed a pint of whisky before coming to work. While I would have loved to fuck her there was no way I wanted a drunk ass Thai girl with me and having to deal with her when she sobered up. So paid bin and left.

It was time to see Noddy at the Butterfly Bar. I have no idea what time I got there and what time I left. I know drinking was on and shots were flying. I staggered out of there with the intention of going to Soi LK and hit the gogos there. Instead I bought some soup and the next thing I know I am at Chicken-Coop with Coop and drinking more there after eating.

It was then my night got even weirder. My DVD seller appeared who I first fucked in 2010 and the next thing I know she’s like we are going to fuck. Fair enough. She gives me a ride on her bike to the room and we did just that and I passed out like a boss. I like to give thanks to kamagra for that one.

Day 3

Had to wake up and doing mandatory morning boom boom with DVD seller again. She’s a lazy fuck wanting me to do all the work which annoys me. So I did it is quickly as possible and promptly said finished.

Once we cleaned up I convinced her to guide me to my friends house to pick up my stuff. She asked that I come see her room. Typical Thai room and off we go to friends house. It should have taken 30 minutes, instead an hour later and 2 phone calls we get there. DVD girl bails and go in and get my stuff and head back to the room.

I hadn’t eaten all day and was famished so went to Retox with the intention of going to Le Poste and seeing Ning afterwards but I was knackered. Said fuck this and took a nap instead.

Finally got woken up around 8 with Aoy telling me she’s at work (again, disclosure she’s still asleep as I write this). That was code for come and get me so I don’t have to pay you 2000 Baht back.

I had other plans. I think I mentioned Ning?

It was off to Le Poste and Ning wasn’t in the room. They yelled her name and she appeared shortly after. She was in the back eating.

I will point out for the record that Ning is batshit crazy. The really good ones tend to be and she’s even more batshit crazy than last time. I don’t let that deter me.

We start in the bar with the blowjob and we moved into the room and things get downright amazing.

I always wanted to try throat fucking. Ning is now into this and demands that you do it. She grabbed my hands and put them on the back of her head and immediately started to slam her face down on my cock. It’s amazingly good! Holy shit amazingly good. I almost popped. She knew it and stopped.

She then made me finger her to orgasm and she had an amazing pussy and is a squirter. I debated on fucking her but screw that, more face fucking please!

We start again and this time I wasn’t letting her stop. I blew all the way in the back of her throat and she had no choice but to swallow it. Dear god it was good. I was drained.

We cleaned up and Ning starts asking me about taking her long time. I have stated for the record she’s batshit crazy. No fucking way am I taking her out of the bar regardless of how good a fuck she would be.

Time To Eject

Need to split day 3 up here because the story takes a turn for the better or worse depending on your view.

So once I finished with Ning it was off to see Aoy and get some food. I can do both where she works so it made sense to kill 2 birds with one stone.

We had a chat and she was like don’t barfine me tonight it’s 600 Baht. Fair enough. We have plans to see a mutual friend of ours on Monday in Jomtiem.

After that it was time to see Noddy. Ended up closing the bar down with him and going to gogo’s on LK afterwards. Something happened with Noddy and the cashier and put his mood off so we had a beer and left once we got to the LK. I finished my beer and ejected.

Most shit was closed but I said fuck it and went to the Rock House. I figured I forgive past sins since its 6 years ago and went in and had a great time. The ladyboys were funny and there were some dudes drinking. One of the ladyboys slipped me her number. I got that going for me! Right?

It’s 5 AM Somewhere

I wasn’t drunk but I wasn’t sober so I figured I might as well see if Aoy was still at work. So I ducked down low and looked into her bar and she was there! Walked in and promptly ordered a soda water with lime and a beer for a drunk Aoy.

She was off work and I was like you want to crash in my room or you going home? Go with you! So off we went to fall asleep at 6 after the usual shenanigans two tired adults can get into.

Action Packed

This will be the conclusion of the wild times as I settle down to do my photography stuff. So the wildness will end and normal sleeping patterns will ensue. But it’ been a hell of a 3 days in Pattaya.

In full disclosure Aoy is now awake. Perfect timing!

Spanky